Am I Too Demanding & Really Having an Attitude??

Is it my problem or my expectation for a special day should be ended with a good note rather than what it is now.

Darling say I have attitude problem, but I don't feel it should be categorized under attitude because all I want is just a simple little gesture of acknowledgment of what I've done to to at least make this distant 1 year anniversary more special with some surprises.

Didn't want darling to feel lonely on this special day to remember for the first year which I am not around.

Why am I always the one doing romantic things or rather lovely surprises (maybe its only me whom I feel it is a surprise) hoping that he will feel the wonderful surprises.

Once Singapore stricke 12 midnight, I wanted to be the first to say Happy Anniversary to you and make you feel loved and how much you mean to me and this special day is a day that we decided to hold each other hands and continue a journey that only the two of us can handle. But all you say was Happy 1 yr anniversary my love, 我也爱你. I know you wana sleep so I never really hope much.

I took up my sleeping time for my flight during the day to make this blog since I am on air 36,000 feet from ground and won't be able to say Happy Anniversary in time, so I configure the message I want to convey to update onto this blog when the clock strikes 12 on the 23 December. But whether you sees this message that I updated on the first second of 23rd December or not, I'm not sure.

I update the status in facebook on our private group after touching down from my long delayed flight (even though I am dead tired) hoping you will check every place that I might leave down notes for you. But I think you didn't realise that.

Thinking you will want to skype on this special day to at least tell me personally "Happy Anniversary" but remembered that there is a party in your office, which I know you won't have the energy to skype after you are back home from my understanding of you. This I can understand as you are out working and back home so late.

But what I can't accept is not even a "Dear, I've read the content on the blog you've specially set up and feel really loved and appreciate your effort", etc. Just a simple phrase like this will make me feel so much better, rather than "I saw yr blogspot n I love it ok le ma". If you did something off your sleep and all you wanted is just a simple phrase of acknowledgement but I told you I saw it and I love it ok or not after I wanted you to, it's no longer sincere anymore.

That is why I am disappointed, because I don't feel the sincere of all that anymore because you say it because I want to hear it, and it makes me feels like I am forcing you to say it.

Am I too demanding to just ask for something this simple or showing attitude to you at all??

Why I want us to remember this date because its an important date, at least for me, and I want us to remember and feel even more love on this day, even though I know you love me a lot. I don't want to become a couple which ended up not even knowing when we even started, how we started, because its the best thing to remember, isn't it.

I didn't want to remember this bad memory on my first year anniversary, but it takes time to forget so bear with me if I ever show real bad attitude at times coz it really affects my mood, a lot. To me, this December is the worst December ever in my life and I hope I won't have anything worst than that coming in future.

Happy 1 Year Anniversary

HAPPY ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY DARLING!!!!

It's the first year anniversary and I am not by your side to celebrate this wonderful day with you, how sad.. But I know you will definitely feel my love over in Singapore.

There isn't much downs in our 1 year relationship (which I think is really good) and I hope that there will never be much downs throughout our relationship.

Thank you for loving me wholeheartedly, and showering me with your love without selfishness. Thank you also for tolerating my mood swing as and when it comes, but seriously, after being together with you my mood swing has improved a lot.

Having you around is the best thing I've ever had. Though you ain't like any other of my ex-lover as romantic, but I can feel that your love has overwhelme anyone else can give me. I love you for who you are and from inside out.

Don't be afraid that I will leave you for the better coz I know I will never find anyone as good as you, who love me as much as you do. I will chesrish you where ever I am and love you no matter what you are.

This song, I share it with you.


I Love You. 我爱你。

A Day Before our First Year Anniversary

Woke up exceptionally early as I slept early last night after my Shanghai flight.

Saw a few facebook post of my friend's video proposal and I got so jealous about their proposal. I started thinking again, why are other people's proposal all so romantic and sweet but mind was just another normal one.

The moment I saw one of my secondary school friend's video proposal, I teared coz it was so so so touching, and the effort put in by the guy was so so so much. I SHOULD HAVE GO AHEAD AND CHASE THAT GUY DURING SECONDARY SCHOOL. Damn!!

But actually, thinking back of how much effort my darling put in, I should also praise him a but as its not easy for a guy to make a scrapbook full of pictures and storyline for a proposal theme. Thanks for the effort darling, though it itsn't really romantic (plus no flower... I shouldn't have accepted it), but I really like and appreciate the scrapbook a lot and of course the effort put in to make it.

Think it's time for you to think about romantic ways to splatter my days with more surprises in future. Haha.

Nevertheless, I love you a lot, my beloved darling.

Muackz...